Everyone's favorite resident Brazilian member of the Movie Madness team, Justin Siriguejo West, is a busy guy. Check out his no-nonsense, action-packed, and efficient as heck recap of Round Two of Battle Royale.
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| This guy right here. |
by Justin West
Anyone can write long-winded reviews of Battle
Royal results, but it takes a true slacker to elude to the outcomes in 17
syllables, or in some cases 34. Def not long enough to bore.
Loki - Batman
Sneaky Odin’s son
Who defeated the dark Knight
No Thor to help him
Far cry from The Mask
Gadgets had no effect in
Hitting holograms
Luke - Ruth Bader Ginsburg
Whiny space wizard
Grandmother of the black robe
The force beats the law
Captain Marvel - Robocop
Strong blondes have more fun
Red Forman started the job
Glowing fists finished.
Vision - Maleficent
Lady with a stick
No match for Invisible
and Invincible!
Superman - Logan
Kyle, man of steel
Logan, adamantium
Illogical end!
Hulk - Scarab Beatles
Who’s playing tonight?
The Jolly Green Giant and
The Shitty Beatles
Are they any good?
They suck! Not a clever name.
Crucial Taunt wails.
Thor - Godzilla
Odin’s handsome son
Already beat Hulk in space
Hammer of justice
The Japanese Hulk
Had no chance from the get go
Make sushi haikus
Scarlet Witch - Darth Vader
Father of Whiny
Defeated by sassy witch,
Destroyed by red hands
Captain America - Deadpool
That ass verse that mouth
Get buff with drugs or mutate?
Always choose the drugs.
Ultron - Eleven
Created by Stark
Verses a teen girl I think.
Spader advances.
Harry Potter - Daredevil / Elektra
Brat with a scarred face
Wins with tiny stick and words.
Worst. Couple. Ever.
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